You know, you forget what it is like to be pregnant when you are not pregnant. I mean, you don't forget intellectually. You can talk about it and reference it and such. But, you don't REALLY remember it. Much like labor. And, this is how God the father made it so that the human race endures.
The other part of the equation is the amazing parts. We can create an aura of fuzziness around the pains of labor because we get the intense joy of having the baby placed in our arms. I think that part of pregnancy gets washed away because there are the special parts like feeling the baby move (although, I acknowledge that there is some legitimate weirdness to it, initially...I mean, really, something is MOVING inside you!).
I have been thinking as I have been going through this pregnancy, which may well be my last, about all of these things. I want to try and write some of my thoughts/feelings/experiences down to avoid the inevitable fuzziness that comes with time and the desire to only remember the "good". I am a much better talker than I am writer, so this may not be as thorough as I'd like ;).
I want to start with some of the cool stuff I've taken note of this time around...
I really DO like feeling the baby move. Even in the middle of the night. Even when he's tumbling or doing what feels like acrobatics. I feel more capable of appreciating (maybe it's a tad more maturity on my part?) the finite nature of these times. I am stoked to have him here; but, right now I am really content with enjoying where we are at. I have liked seeing it progress to making my belly move with some of his stronger movements. I remember being pregnant with Brennan 11 years ago and thinking it was really strange to see my belly move. Now, I try to get someone else (whether it's Travis or the kids) to witness it because I think it's AWESOME. And, it makes me want to share that :).
There have been a few times that the movements have been painful. But, overall, I still enjoy the moving. Lately, some of the big movements have seemed to kick into certain organs or down in my pelvis and that sucks. Then, it passes and I am back to enjoying a movement here and there.
Brennan and Kaia have both been able to feel the baby move on more than one occasion. Travis has felt him lots...he likes to tell him to stop kicking his Mama :). Jenavieve wasn't ever able to while she was here, which was a bummer for me. Elise hasn't been able to, and I almost wonder if it's because her hands are so small or because she just doesn't have the focus to stay still and recognize a movement...
...to be continued...
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